Apr 21, 2010

"The Battle Surrendered - Part Four"

The Battle Surrendered
Part Four
Storyteller SilverLoom

     He shouldered the coiled rope and strode into the forest.
     I scurried after Him, calling, “Wait! Where are we going?”
     “Follow me.”
     I halted. “Did You just quote Yourself?”
     Thankfully, He understood my sense of humor and laughed. “Yes, I tend to do that. It makes it easier for people to see things the way I do.”
     “And that’s supposed to mean…?” I asked as I again hurried to keep up with Him.
     “That I never change. I am the same at this moment as I was two-thousand years ago, and as I was at the creation of the universe. Today, tomorrow, and yesterday, I remain the same. And so I can quote Myself in everything.”
     We continued walking. And walking. And… walking. The forest floor was uncommonly free of debris, and a soft carpet of moss covered the earth, much to the glee of my bare feet. But after several hours of walking, and walking, and… walking, I finally said, “Ok, don’t get me wrong. I want to follow You wherever You go. But can You give me some clue as to where we’re headed? Please?”
     “We are going home,” Jesus replied.
     I gasped audibly, feeling both excitement and fear. He took one look at my face and cracked up. “No, dear heart! I mean your house. It’s not your time yet.”
     “Oh,” I said. Then I saw the funny side of it and laughed along with Him. After a few minutes, it finally occurred to me what He had said. “Hey! Why are You taking me back home? You said You were going to train me!” I cried.
     “No worries,” He replied. “We won’t arrive until you’re trained.”
     It took me a while to try to sort that out. “So… You’ll be training me on the way?”
     “Yes. We won’t get there until you’re trained.”
     “Oh, ok. Gotcha.” Little did I suspect that I had no clue what He meant.
     We walked some more. And walked. And… well, you know. But it wasn’t as boring as it sounded. The forest was beautiful and peaceful, and I was walking beside the Prince of Peace.
     Presently, Jesus remarked, “We’ll stop here and make camp. We’ll continue your training in the morning.”
     I can’t deny that I gave Him a funny glance. Continue? I wasn’t aware that we had started. I hadn’t even touched a sword or a bow yet!
     He stripped the lower branches off some nearby trees and soon had a small fire going. We ate bread and drank water that came from the pack He carried on His back.
     We slept on the soft moss under some light blankets from Jesus’s pack. The weather was perfect. I didn’t feel cold until early in the morning.
     Shivering, I pulled the blanket more tightly around me. My eyelids fluttered for just a second, but what I saw in that moment made me sit up and scream.
     The shadow creatures were back.


Galadriel said...

It's...unsettling to think of Jesus with a sense of humor, although I'm sure he has one./

Celebrilomiel said...

I love it! =D You have a unique and companionable style that's fun and engaging.
I especially liked the part about Jesus quoting Himself. It's so true, and a really good reminder. And... it feels weird to say this, but it sounds like something He would say, too. It seems extremely weird to refer to my King as a character... but you managed to pull in some of the deeper elements, and I really like that.

Millardthemk said...

Loved it! Jesus makes a great writer character :) He really stars in a best seller I am told.

The ending really leaves me needing to find out what happens!

Storyteller said...

Galardiel, I know He has a sense of humor because He created some people I know who would not exist if He didn't know how to be funny. :)

Celeb, that "quoting Yourself" part is my favorite, I think. I'm glad you like Jesus's character. If He is our friend, (and He is), then why should He not act casual, as friends do? Still the faithful, loving Savior - still Jesus - but not as supernatural as we usually see in allegories. That was my prevailing thought as I wrote His parts; to show Him as a friend.

Yay, Millard is hooked! :D

Barie said...

I love the frankness of it . . sometimes all the symbolism just starts to feel the same. It's a breath of fresh air to see someone just say it flat out that He's Jesus, not renaming Him yet again.

Celebrilomiel said...

Well, you did a wonderful job of it!!

I'm hooked, too, need I mention? ;)

Jake said...


Keep on writing!

Anonymous said...

I confess I used to wonder how the Almighty God could have a sense of humor. It is sad how so many people thing He is not fun. Think of the platypus! Think of a dog running across a field with his tongue hanging out! Like ST said, think of people! Do we think WE created fun? Of course not! In fact, we are probably boring compared to God! :)
We all underestimate Jesus.
- Emma
P.S. Oh dear, I hope I didn't come off as condemning! I have only recently realized this myself! :)

Son of the King said...

Wow, great job again! I enjoy coming onto your blog and have the pleasure of being greeted by a fantastic story.

~Son of the King~

Storyteller said...

I'm overjoyed that all of you are liking it! Thank you!

Anonymous said...

Epic picture!


Storyteller said...

Danke, whisper! Her foot/leg was hard to draw. :)